MRS. GRANNY:

You can call me Mrs. Granny.

JANELLE:

Mrs..... Granny?

MRS. GRANNY:

Good Girl!

Shall I tell you something Henrietta?

JANELLE:

My name is Janelle.

MRS. GRANNY:

That man down the street? Kevin Marshal? You know him?

JANELLE:

Mr. Marshal.

MRS. GRANNY:

We used to be lovers.

JANELLE:

I should go on home.

MRS. GRANNY:

Alright deary.

Two days later.

JANELLE:

Mrs. Granny?

MRS. GRANNY:

What is it Henreitta?

JANELLE:

I'm back, and I brought some fig newtons.

MRS. GRANNY:

Oh, whats that? I can't see you in the light so good.

OFFICER 1:

Mrs. Granny, this is the NOPD.

MRS. GRANNY:

Henreitta?

OFFICER 1:

(to Janelle)

Get back girl. You did a good job. Now run along.

JANELLE:

Sorry Mrs. Granny!

OFFICER 1:

Mrs. Granny we want you to come with us now.

MRS. GRANNY:

Why would I do that. Oh no.... no. Stupid kids.

OFFICER 2:

Will you eat this?

MRS. GRANNY:

I dont want your food.

OFFICER 2:

You don't have to be afraid, ma'am.

MRS. GRANNY:

I'm not scared of nobody, no way.

OFFICER 1:

We need to excavate her.

MRS. GRANNY:

Exca-who? I know about ex's! And x-rays, and exoskeletons, and exits-- and no-o-o thanks! I'll stay right here.

OFFICER 2:

You're getting your drawers soiled.

MRS. GRANNY:

Get back! You're vulgar.

OFFICER 1:

Ma'am, we're trying to help. What do you eat?

MRS. GRANNY:

Beetles.

OFFICER 2:

Where do you sleep?

MRS. GRANNY:

Under that car.

OFFICER 1:

Have you been taking drugs?

MRS. GRANNY:

Stop putting words in my mouth.

Get going. Don't need no one. Nobody. No way, no how. I know how social security works!